


Dirk; The Accused

by nunquius



Series: Legalities, Legalities [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Humanstuck, Jake POV, Multi, dirkjake - Freeform, trans!Dave
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2017-12-13
Packaged: 2018-08-27 13:27:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8403430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nunquius/pseuds/nunquius
Summary: One late night, long after distance had grown between the two, Dirk Strider shows up on Jake English's doorstep. Dirk is frantic, and something is up. He came, alone and desperate, and begged Jake to let him stay there. Will they rekindle old friendships, or will they perhaps become something more yet again? They discuss the past, but something big is staring Jake in the face: he doesn't know what exactly Dirk is hiding from.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go. This is it. Jake's pov, let's see what exactly decides to go down. Time for an adventure.

The knocking started at about two in the morning. I say knocking, but it was more like an incessant, torturous pounding. In fact, it was so relentless that I was a little panicked by it. I rubbed my eyes and slammed my glasses on my face, quickly hopping out of bed and into my slippers and robe. I slid down the banister and then to the front door, where I looked through the peep-hole to see a sight I didn't expect.

Pounding on my door, pale as a ghost, was my ex-boyfriend. We hadn't talked in god knew how long, and I still felt guilty to no end about my actions over the course of our relationship. I was selfish and dumb, which honestly doesn't surprise me as I look back. Those were just daily affairs of good ole Jake English, I'd say, though that won't help the guilt. In fact, it greatly contributes to it, as I know he dated me knowing fully well that I was the way I was. But when I saw him there at my door, something sparked in my heart. It was most likely pity for the bird with the wounded wing, shown up on my doorstep. I opened the door slowly so as to not get hit by the man's frantically flailing limbs.

"Dirk? Dirk, it's okay. I'm here, calm down." He didn't even seem to hear my sad, awkward attempts at soothing him. Instead, the boy took a look at me and nodded towards the interior of my home. I offered to let him in and stepped aside as he walked in and began to pace rapidly with his hands on his head.

"Dirk...are you quite alright?"

Tears were forming in my eyes, and he must have seen fear invading the abysmal forests in them when he looked at me, because he stopped in the middle of the room, frozen. I blinked, and a couple of those tears rolled down my face. "Jake...I'm sorry," he whispered, headed for a seat on the couch.

"What?" I sat next to him as he put his head in his hands.

"I don't know why I came here. I shouldn't have come."

"Nonsense, Dirk. You-“ I paused to choose my words carefully, and sighed in discontent because of course I could never find the right ones. “You've always been welcome. Though I have to ask what brings you to my humble abode at such an hour."

Dirk put his shades, previously almost crushed in his tense fists, on his face, much to my disappointment. Unfortunately, he became even more unreadable with the glasses on.

"It's a long story, Jake, and I don’t think I have the energy to relay it right now."

"Oh."

"I need to stay here a while. In secret. Just to... Get away from home. Something happened."  Dirk nodded in a way that seemed almost as if he was reassuring himself. "Oh, right. Forgot to ask. If you want me to leave I can hide somewhere else."

I still remember the state of Dirk's home. He should have moved out ages ago: he's nearly twenty now, and his house is utter hell. The middle of three sons in an orphaned family, his older brother was a fiend. Abusive, manipulative, and all around awful, he was highly unaccepting and cruel toward both of the younger Striders. This was especially notable towards their youngest brother, Dave. But Dirk had to stay. Dave was barely fifteen and Dirk couldn't stand to leave him in that position alone. Not when he would have to change who he was. Dirk stayed for Dave's protection. They were nearly always together, so where was the younger boy?

"Dirk, what about Dave? Why isn't he with you?”

Dirk sat up quickly and grabbed for his phone from his pocket. "Just a minute, let me text him. He's at his friend Karkat's overnight, I need to tell him he needs to stay there for a while. Home is not okay. Home is really not okay right now, Jake."

“Does he need to come here too?”

“No, it’s best that we stay split up for now.”

I nod. "Dirk?"

"Yes, Jake?"

"After you message your brother, you should go shower and rest. You look like a right mess, and it's late. Did you bring anything? Like, clothes and such."

"...Shit."

"I'll lay some clothes on the guest bed while you're showering. I believe you remember where everything is?"

"Yeah, I remember."

"Goodnight then, Dirk," I nodded and stood.

"Goodnight. Oh, and thanks." Dirk responded, standing with me.

"Any time."


	2. Chapter 2

The next day, I barely woke up to my alarm, having not slept well due to that late night interruption. I'd been curious as to what exactly had driven Dirk from his home, especially when it led him to me of all people. I knew from the various social media outlets (that our female friends had persuaded us to join) that Roxy's house was often occupied by the two younger Striders. When Dave wasn't with Dirk, he was at school or with friends. He gave the Vantas boy "music taste improval" lessons. Dave was very proud of his lesson's title, and had a bunch of flyers up all over town. It was, to use a word the Striders absolutely hate being called, extraordinarily adorable.

Seems that even in the middle of an odd crisis I can lose my train of thought and get carried away. Maybe that's especially during the crises. Unfortunately, I'd been exploring my own noggin so much after Dirk showed up that I only got two hours of sleep, and trying to deal with some of the more rogue customers at the drive-in diner while on actual wheels proves to be rather difficult when I'm half-awake. But I swore when I took the job that each day I worked, I'd skate and serve with pride.

Before I left, I looked to see how my new refugee was faring. Dirk was asleep in the same defenseless position he'd always slept in. Arms around a pillow, face buried in it, triangular sunglasses clasped tight in his hand. It's a wonder those things never break with how tightly he’s always latched onto them. He was peacefully snoozing on top of the blankets instead of underneath them, and he was wearing the green skull shirt I had given him. He had set the sweatpants I'd provided aside, and slept in only his boxers. It was a shame that the only time Dirk looked peaceful and calm was when he was asleep, but it made sense that he didn't like to sleep at home; he never could relax like that when his older brother was around.

I decided to leave him a note, but I got just a tiny bit carried away writing, as I often do.

"Dear Dirk," I began in my favorite green pen. "I know that we've been distanced lately, and that the blame is likely pinned on me. I just want you to know that I truly do care about you and I hope everything works out. In some sick sense, I may be just a little glad that you came to me when you needed desperately to escape. It's relieving that you feel safe with me. I sincerely hope that you find your time here therapeutic, and that maybe after you leave we can be on better terms. You're welcome anywhere in the house, and to anything it has to offer. Please eat something when you wake up; I have plenty. You can take clothes from my dresser if the need arises. I'm off to the diner to skate my way to hell! Toodles!" With that done, I headed out. Fortunately I wasn't all too late to work, so I strapped on my skates and prepared for the day.

 

I was soon visited by the usual morning crew I had grown to know well. I always found pleasant conversation in the summer with a sweet girl named Feferi, who was on her way to her lifeguarding job at the water park, her cousin Meenah snoring in the passenger seat. Kankri, Karkat's older brother, came by before work to order a cup of ice and try to talk my ear off. Eventually, I managed to pardon myself with the excuse of other customers. Jane pulled in just in time for me to use her as an excuse.

Each day, after putting some cookies and cupcakes in the oven at her bakery, Jane Crocker came to menu number three and ordered French toast sticks. Today I brought them out to her with a gleeful smile. "Howdy ho, Janey! How goes life and the bakery business?"

Jane took the bag from my hand and gave me exact change, as she always did. "Slow, but improving for sure. I see you're wearing the uncomfortable shorts again." She eyed my shorts with disdain, but quickly gave me a goofy grin to show she was only teasing me.

"Uncomfortable only for you, dearest Jane!” I laughed. “I thoroughly enjoy all that these shorts have to offer. Material, color, length..."

"Length? You mean lack of length. Those red shorts remind me of Roxy's rave gear! Have some dignity at your job, Jake.”

I rolled my eyes with a smile. "Ah yes, speaking of Roxanne! How is she faring?"

"She's...faring. I'm trying to get her into AA, but every time I go to get her she's hung over. Last time I went into her room, there was a man passed out in her closet. I'm going to pretend like I'm mad about it, and hopefully she'll start seeing straight."

 

I nodded. Roxy was known for loving her alcohol. It was quite a shame-she was incredibly smart. Even when drunk, her intelligence shone like a bright beacon in the sky.

"The Strilondes as a whole have always have a problem with seeing straight, in more than one sense of the word." I giggled at myself, but even mention of the Strider family made me think about Dirk again. Jane and Roxy usually avoided the subject of the family out of pity for me and our history. I wondered if he would mind me telling our closest shared friends of his location. I could tell Jane about Dirk, or avoid the subject. She mistook the look on my face for the sort of regretful, sad expression I often presented when thinking about Dirk, and glanced down at her clock.

"Well, Jake, I've got to get going. Can I expect you to stop by later?"

"Yes, but it'll have to be quick. I've got some research to do tonight."

"Oh? Well, good luck with that, I suppose. As great a coworker Aranea is, I can't trust her to hold up the fort for too long. I spend a lot of money on that building and I'd hate to see it go down in ashes. I'll see you later!"

I started skating backwards, waving at Jane as she pulled out. "Farewell, old chum! Here's to busin-oomph!" In the midst of my sentence, I smashed into a table and my knees buckled. I went down and ended up with my arms on the table, my legs on the seat, and my rear somewhere in between. The wheels on my feet whizzed speedily.

"Jake, you're still too clumsy to be a skating carhop!" Jane laughed out her window as she drove out of the parking lot. I groaned, but laughed along with her as I waved goodbye.

After Jane left, I had a somewhat boring shift. I got to see Roxy later, but she was hung over, and wasn't quite up to the task of carrying a conversation. She just got her vanilla Sprite, tipped me generously, and winced at the sound of her engine as she sped away on her hot pink motorcycle.

At four, I got off work. It took a lot of self-control not to call Dirk right away. He hadn't so much as sent a text message since I'd been at work, and that worried me just a little. I decided it'd probably just be smarter to go to Jane's, eat the grande ol' English special, and talk to Dirk when I got home. So I headed to Jane's bakery, cleverly named “Crocker’s Bakery” with the slogan “Baked goods made of life!”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me? updating? why i never...

“The least you could’ve done was change before you got here,” Jane rolled her eyes as she set the fresh hot triple layer brownie cake a la mode in front of me.

“I didn’t bring any spare clothes with me to work, or I might’ve. You’ll deal with it.” I laugh and reach for a fork.

“You’re a beacon to the outside world in those shorts. Women and men alike crowd at the window of my fine establishment, and I have to have Aranea chase them away with a broom!” The mention of Aranea drew her out of the back room.

“What else needs to be done, Jane?” Aranea poked her head through the door.

“As long as you’ve cleaned the oven, you’re good to go. You can count out half of the tips from the jar and take them with you. Jake’ll help me finish up.” I opened my mouth to protest, but Jane glanced at me with daggers in her eyes, so I just nodded and took a bite of my chocolate treat. Aranea began counting money.

I looked down at my plate and picked at the food with my fork. I’m the type to lose my appetite when worried, and boy, was I worried about Dirk. Jane had been my friend long enough to know that when I wasn’t eating, something was wrong. “Jake English. You’re thinking about Dirk again.” I couldn’t tell Jane about his situation yet. It wouldn’t be fair to Dirk. But I didn’t have to avoid the subject entirely.

“Okay, you caught me. I am. It’s hard to avoid.”

“Jake, he broke up with you. You and Dirk, you just… You didn’t last, okay? He thought you were distant, he was clingy, and you were both blind to problems, as you have both always been. It’s for the best and you know it. But I can understand you worrying about how it ended. Silence between old friends is painful.”

“I just want to know what he’s up to. I want to know if he’s alright, Janey, is that so bad?” I sighed and tilted my head back in impatience.

“Jake, I’ve seen him with Roxy. As far as I know, he’s with her at parties.”

“You don’t mean…” My eyes widened. The ding of the door when Aranea left reminded me that I was in the middle of a thought. “Has Dirk been drinking? He usually wouldn't touch alcohol, said it dulled his senses.”

“Not as far as I know. You know how he is, he worries about her. I think he’s just looking after Rolal. About a month ago, I woke up with him on my couch.”

“Have you seen him since?”

“No, I haven’t seen him since. I can tell when he’s been taking care of Roxy because she comes home alone or with him. I love Roxy to bits, but she’s going to lose her intelligence if she doesn’t lighten up on the booze.”

“How’s it been with his brothers?”

“Jake, I don’t know,” Jane snapped, annoyed. “Do I need to call him? Do I need to set up a reunion so you can fall into his arms and apologize and beg to have him back, after everything's already fallen out and you're doing better without him?”

I look at my lap, wounded by her harshness.. “No, I suppose not. Guess I'm just worried is all. You know their brother.”

Jane sighs. “Since you’re not eating your cake, do you want to help me finish wiping the tables? I’ll get you a to-go box.”

“That sounds alright. Could you throw in a couple snickerdoodles?”

“I’m sorry I got so annoyed. I’m just tired of you two asking about each other. You should just get over it and be friends again. Snickerdoodles? I suppose I could toss some in the box.” She walks toward the back room.

“Wait,” I was shocked, “He’s asked about me?”

“Yes, all the time.” Jane scooped the cake into the to-go box and put two cookies on either side of it. “Just little updates from time to time, occasionally. I can’t tell how he feels about it through his shades and he doesn’t show anything but stoicism in his voice. He has your number.”

“Blimey, Jane! Why didn’t you say that in the first place?” I shot up and grinned, pulling a groaning Jane Crocker into a great hug. “Thank you very much! I feel better already! I best be going now, ciao!” I ran out the door, and after the ding of the exit bell, Jane sighed. “Thanks for helping me clean up, pal."


	4. Chapter 4

When I got home, it seemed that everything had remained untouched. That was concerning, seeing as my new houseguest wasn't exactly the neatest fellow. I wondered if the events of last night were merely a dream. A look around the house informed me than, no, Dirk's presence wasn't a figment of my imagination, he had just kept to himself. He was on his phone in the room I had let him sleep in, with the bed unmade, and him still in my clothes. The only difference between now and last night is that he had grabbed a box of cereal from my pantry and it was set on my bed, open.

"Oy, Dirk! I'm home!"

"Cool," Dirk nodded, tapping away at his screen. 

"What have you been up to?" I leaned against the door. What are you supposed to say to the man you haven't seen in months when he's sitting on your bed in your clothes?

"Nothin'" He didn't even look up at me.

"Oh, well then, I'll be in the office, in case you need me." I stay put just a bit longer before I head to walk away.

"Gotcha."

I paused before shutting the door behind me. "You do remember where that is, right?"

"Yep."

I went to my office in a sort of stupor. You'd think conversation with a friend of years would come naturally, but I guess a failed relationship cancels that out. This was just what I had feared. Stupid, stupid Jake. I sat at my desk and ran my hands through my hair until they got caught. I kept them there, caught up in my hair, and clenched my fists. It didn't hurt, it just felt like pressure; it felt nice. I shut my eyes because I didn't want to think so much, but a thought in motion stays in motion, and this thought was an unpreventable one. I thought about Dirk, again, for the millionth time.

At first it was wonderful; I'd just moved into my inherited house, and I was ecstatic to be living near my dear long-distance friend, Jane Crocker. She'd insisted that I host a housewarming party, and that she had the guest list covered. She said there were only going to be four of us, which I was okay with, so I planned accordingly. I had snacks and movies, one of which was my favorite from the island. Jane and her guests showed up all together, and Jane let them all in. First Jane, my best friend, followed by Roxy, who instantly headed towards the couch and plopped down. Roxy and Jane were gorgeous, but Roxy was definitely stunning. Her smile lit up my house more than any lamp could, and I had no idea how she could balance on those big heels. After Roxy came DIrk. My first thought was that my house was full of beauty and I was lacking, but Dirk cut my thoughts off in their tracks. He smirked in the way I came to know only him to do, and he adjusted those silly shades on his face. He asked me why I had brought movies, because he only needed to look at me. Roxy laughed and told him to slow down, while I just furiously blushed. He definitely knew how to fluster me, but he had his moments of awkwardness, too. Our banter felt natural, like we'd known each other for years, and Roxy was known to tease us for our relentless flirting. I thought it was just friendly at the time. Jane didn't really talk much that night.

I heard a knock at my door, even though it was already open, and my eyes fluttered open to see Dirk in the doorway. My face instantly flushes a gentle pink, and I pull my hands into my lap. "Dude, are you okay?" He asked, raising his brow.

"Oh, yes," I chuckled awkwatdly, "Just thinking about things."

"You know that's no good for you," Dirk smirked. I smiled and exhaled through my nose. It was hard to laugh at his banter, it still hurt. "Anyways," he continued, "If I give you some cash will you go buy some McDonald's or something? I haven't eaten in days."

"Nonsense, Dirk, you know very well I won't take your money. And I can't stand fast food at night, that isn't a real meal. However, I can prepare something for us. what would you like?"

"You know _very well_ I won't tell you what to cook, Jake. I'm not picky, and you really don't have to. I don't expect you to spend all your energy on caring for me." Mocking me must come naturally to Dirk, but I never mind. He does it because it's funny.

"I need to cook dinner anyways, or I won't eat. Chicken salad okay for tonight? I have quite the hankering for a salad."

"Sounds fine by me."

"Wonderful, would you like to come with me to the grocery store?"

"No, I don't think I can do that. I'll just wait here. Is there anything you need done?"

"Not a thing, love, I-" I stopped mid-sentence. I thought maybe calling him love might overstep some bro-boundary, and I didn't want to ruin a rekindled friendship before it even existed. 

He didn't react, at least not that I could tell. His shades hid most reactions. I much preferred when he took them off. "Are you sure, man? I've got nothing on my plate, literally and metaphorically, I'm so bored that I might keel over."

"Make your bed, then? That's really all I can think of." I stood and grabbed my keys. "Need anything else?"

"Orange Crush?" I nodded. The carbonated drink, with the most ironic name. Coming right up, Dirk.


	5. Chapter 5

I gathered the ingredients for my meal, some junk food I knew Dirk liked, and four liters of orange soda from the nearest grocery store. I made my way home and this time, my house was loud with activity. Dirk was tinkering with something at the living room table. I had no clue what kind of things he had gathered or where in the world they had come from. "What in the absolute _fuck_ are you doing, Strider?"

Dirk wiped the sweat from his brow and turned to me. No shades. "Told you I was bored, man. I found some junk in the attic, mostly broken clocks and old computers."

"Do you have a plan for this assortment of gears and technology, or are you just toying around?"

"This is a top secret project, Jake. For my eyes only."

"Dirk, you're brutally annihilating my grandma's first computer system."

"Fine, fine. I'll let you in. Remember that old AR I had? The one from my shades?"

"Hal! Of course I remember Hal, that old snot. Dear, dear." Dirk had accidentally stepped on his mecha-shades with Hal programmed into them, thus quickly ending Jake's growing rivalry with the AI. 

Dirk held up a small green chip between his pointer and middle fingers. "See, the thing is, I actually saved all his programming on this card here. His 'personality' you might say. I think it's time for a revival session. I wanna bring this asshole back from the dead, just to see if I can manage it."

"Blimey, Dirk. That's fantastic. Use anything you need to around the house, alright? My only request is that you give him the ability to use... Audible speech. Not just messaging. It'll be easier."

"Oh, I plan on it." Dirk winked and turned back around, arranging some gears and batteries and whatnot. 

I prepared two chicken salads and brought Dirk's to him. He waved at me, fully encompassed in his project, but I insisted. "Dirk, if you don't eat this now, I'll find this and you in the exact same position when I wake up in the morning. You need to eat and get ready for bed. No keeping me up all night with your tomfoolery."

"But Jake, I-" DIrk began speaking, but he was cut off by a whirring, robotic noise, followed by a voice coming through a small speaker.

"No, you'd rather keep him up with your own brand of tomfoolery, wouldn't you, Jake?" The voice was everywhere; it changed constantly in pitch and style, but somehow contained the same condescending tone that he portrayed via messaging.

"What the hell, Dirk! You already hooked him up?"

"Well I wanted some company while I was making the rest of him, but to be fair, I told him to _keep quiet for now_." He adjusted the volume on the speaker.

"Oh, come on, DIrk. Jake misses me." Hal's crazy voice was ridiculously quiet, and Dirk made a triumphant _hmph_ noise.

I rolled my eyes. "Eat. Bed. No more Hal for tonight."

"But-"

"Dirk. You have all day tomorrow while I work. I will not be kept up late another night by you, you fiend."

"Alright, alright." Dirk plopped down his tools and moved from the ground to the couch. I turned on the television, and Avatar was playing yet again. 

"You didn't even touch the TV while I was gone? Serious self-control, Dirk."

"It doesn't even look like it's changed at all since I left."

 _Since I Left._ I looked down at my lap. For just a while, it almost felt as if nothing had changed. But my mind whirred up again, and I was thinking about him leaving. And how much I missed him. And how much I was scared we'd lose contact again, even if we've barely even become friends.

"I'm going to go wash up and head to bed, old chum," I said softly. "Lost my appetite."

Dirk began to ask something, but changed his mind and the course of his words. "Okay. G'night, man."

"Night." I scurried off like a rodent running from an owl in the night, and went to bed.


End file.
